Wednesday, June 1, 2011

What do I want?

I wrote this in November.  It was my attempt to make a list of what I want in a relationship, under the suggestion of my marriage counselor.  I think more attention might be beneficial, and I would like input on what you think you need in a relationship to be happy.

Want best for each other
Place importance on relationship-demonstrate by making choices to show its priority
That excitement when about to see each other
Butterflies and all
Happiness in each others presence
Hugs and kisses regularly
Holding hands
Willingness to make sacrifices

Companionship / Friendship
Talk freely
Interest in same things
Think the same things are important/ interesting—share them
Walking path together
Shared sense of humor
Enjoy spending time together doing things
Pursue common interests together yet still have individual activities
Support each other in pursuing things
Ability to talk candidly
Can say things without the other person pouting about it or acting negatively
Go out and have fun
Have dates together
Have common friends—enjoy the same people together
Do things on own and not feel guilt about it
Listen with interest-not just listening for a pause to speak in

Believe in what the other says
Know that the other will follow through
No empty promises
Security in own person
Not needing the other person to define or complete you

Common Goals
Going in same direction
Want same things: children, lifestyle, job
Open to new experiences
Want to live life—experience for sake of experience
Share same values
Willingness to stand up for values; conviction
Have same ideas about raising children
Value hard work
Share and build up dreams

Joy, direction
Lust for life
Physical attraction
Not using sex manipulatively
Emotional needs met, not just sexual


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